Watch Your Mulch
I hate mulch. Katharine hates mulch. When I stepped out of the home ownership game in 2002, I swore I would never buy mulch again. I hate having it delivered, hate shoveling it into a wheelbarrow, hate spreading it...just hate it. So now I'm a homeowner again...couldn't stand getting screwed in the rental market any longer. Last weekend, we started looking around our yard...otherwise known as "Monty's Personal Wonderland Racetrack" and decided we had to do SOMETHING to improve our property. The part of the yard formerly known as the GRASS is too far gone, so we figued something to decorate areas around the yard. Maybe a brick patio. Maybe some flowers. Possibly some crushed stone around the edges. Wait a minute...crushed stone is friggin heavy...shoveling that is worse than shoveling mulch. We debated for days...what we should do. And debated some more. One of the reasons I hate mulch so much...about 1/2 of the 5 yards you usually have dumped, sits dumped in your yard forever...through the summer...and the winter...and then you use it up NEXT spring, but you have to get MORE delivered when you run out and it starts the cycle again.
We went to Home Depot, my least favorite place on the planet, and bought BAGS of mulch to get around the "pile" issue. We bought 6 bags (which Katharine happily loaded into the truck since I can't lift shit)...we went home and spread that out...decided we needed more. We went back to the loathesome Home Depot and picked up 8 more bags. Only used 4 of the 8, so guess what? Now instead of a pile in the yard...there's a pile in the back of my truck. Fuck. Maybe we'll get those patio blocks this up-coming weekend...
We went to Home Depot, my least favorite place on the planet, and bought BAGS of mulch to get around the "pile" issue. We bought 6 bags (which Katharine happily loaded into the truck since I can't lift shit)...we went home and spread that out...decided we needed more. We went back to the loathesome Home Depot and picked up 8 more bags. Only used 4 of the 8, so guess what? Now instead of a pile in the yard...there's a pile in the back of my truck. Fuck. Maybe we'll get those patio blocks this up-coming weekend...
posted by Jeff - WeinerToons at 8:42 AM
5 Comments:
I can't express how much pleasure it gives me to think of Katharine voluntarily buying bags of mulch, heaving them around and then spreading them. I'm sure she must be flashing back to her childhood, and the happy hours she spent with large piles of mulch and wheelbarrows.
Astroturf is probably looking pretty good about now. Let's see Monty wear ruts in that!
personally, I cherish the memory of our mother chainsawing the forsisthia (sp?) plants while we poured salt on them, then laying down the black plastic sheeting, then followed up by mulch.
I believe she still loves to blame our father for the fact that we had too many forsisthia and it was not alternating with some other flowering bush...
Imagine that. You have extra mulch in your truck and I was just thinking how we need mulch. Yet I can't bare the thought of suffering through Home Depot with three wild kids who just want to climb on all the rider mowers. Why don't you save me the trip and drop off some mulch at my place so I can put the kids to work in the yard. We also have an out-of-control forsithia bush that needs hacking, so feel free to stay and put our chainsaw to use.
-kristen
HAHAHA! Uhm...let me think about that and get back to you. If you don't hear back from me about this is the next few months...wait a bit longer and then it will snow and you won't have to worry about it anymore!!!
:-)
Jeff, I don't have a response to this blog. I just wanted to say hi and I'm going back to the desert for the 3rd time in my AF career. Not too bad for 11 years but it's getting old quick. Just 9 years to go and I'll be done with this crap. E-mail me sometime when you get the chance.
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