Nobody Ever Wins Those Damn Toys

It's true - 35 years old and I'm still worried about winning carnival toys.

This is me, just last week...a couple of tokens at the arcade gets you a chance to win a big prize. You guessed it...a small, fuzzy, stuffed toy. You've all seen it before; the machine that lets you direct the giant claw down on some unsuspecting toy, who is then lifted away, never to be seen by his friends again. At least that's the Toy Story version. But in my version of the story, the little creature is not whisked away...it's not even picked up because no matter how hard I try, I can't win! This is a kids game! What the hell?! When I was 13, I went to a carnival and bought my girlfriend a stuffed animal because I couldn't win one. Things apparently haven't changed.

And while I'm on the subject of kids games...who the hell invented Dance, Dance, Revolution? Obviously, it was invented by coordinated people, for coordinated people, but that's not me. No way. This fact was obvious when I almost fell off the Revolution platform into a collection of small kids nearby...kids that destroyed any score that I thought of achieving. I guess this is their time to shine in their age of videogames that are far more interactive than when I used to play PaperBoy and Joust. Makes me wonder what the future of games will bring.