Get Them Excited So They Don't Notice We're Screwing Them

That's right...that should be the motto of the US Postal Service who just announced the 30th Anniversary commemorative Star Wars Stamps. I thought Elvis stamps were cool, and then SuperHero stamps were cooler, but this is even WAY cooler than either of those.

Did you see that? Don't blink...you might miss it. You think this is a cool announcement too, but did you notice what I noticed? Maybe you already knew. Maybe I don't pay enough attention to the news. That stamp has a 41 on it where the 39 should be. Apparently on May 14, 2007, the price of stamps is going up to 41 cents! Is that the cost of getting into bed with George Lucas or the actual cost of mailing a letter? I know what I think...how about you? Did any of you know about the increase?

Seems Like Old Times...If Only I Could Tell You About It

I want to tell you about it, I just can't because my voice is gone. Gone, gone, gone. As in, I can't talk. I know...some of you see that as a good thing, but it makes me a sad panda. Beware, this is a long story.

Last night, I went out with an old friend. I've known Bob since we both left Boston for Basic Training 15 years ago, when I was young and Bob was younger (but not by much). So here's how people change over 15 years...and I remnind you that we did our best to duplicate the pose from memory even though the picture was 10 feet away on my computer.

Let's note the obvious differences...we're much better looking now. We're 15 years older in the second one. Neither one of us has shell necklaces on in 2007...how come nobody told us to take those off in 1992? We're much better singers now, as we learned at last night's Karaoke at the Hong Kong at Fanuiel Hall. Our versions of "Taking Care of Business", "Twist and Shout", and Bob's special "Just a Gigolo" were met with thunderous appluase...or a least a pat on the back or two from some drunk people. Speaking of drunk people...we were both TRASHED in the first picture and as you can see in the most recent one; Bob is holding Ginger Ale.

We stayed out pretty late...had a lot of reminiscing to do until 445am. And I wonder why I can't speak this morning...lots of loud singing...late night chatting...but I think we had a fantastic time.

Here's to old friends!

Do I Look Like I Would Run a Marathon? But I Know Somebody That Is...

Last year, a group of us went to cheer on our friend Tara as she completed the Boston Marathon...this year, she's running for a cause! "The Pine Street Inn is New England's leading resource for homeless and formerly homeless individuals. Pine Street serves 1,200 men and women each day through street outreach, emergency shelter, job training, and affordable housing". You can support Tara and help the homeless at the same time by visiting her fundraising page to make a donation.

I know it's rare for me, but this is a serious fundraiser. Let's show Tara and the Pine Street Inn how many WeinerToons.Com fans also care about the homeless! Thanks for your support. Oh...and if you give to this fundraiser, leave a comment here as well and you'll appear in a special edition of Alfred, Unibrow, and the Big Headed Boy following the marathon!!! On a side note, we're having a little pie in the face contest to raise more money. Here's what happened to me in 1996 during a similar contest...maybe some of you were there.

My Doctor Held My Prescription Hostage

Has this ever happened to you? So, I take this medicine that controls stomach acid...not a big deal...take one a day and the discomfort goes bye bye. The problem I have comes up everytime this medicine is up for prescription renewal. My doctor likes to take the opportunity to get me in for an appointment so she can make some money. Money, money, money always seems to come before healthcare.

Last time I needed a refill, my doctor told me that my insurance company insisted on her giving me a different medication. The one I'm taking works well, has no obvious side effects...why would I want to take something different. Having grown to mistrust doctors, I called the insurance company and they said there was no such policy. I smell kickbacks...but I have no proof. My doctor didn't argue when I called to tell her. This time, when up for renewal, the same doctor insists that I make an appointment for a physical before she will refill my prescription...BUT...they're not booking physicals until July...I'm glad it's so important to her for me to go in. I make my appointment...I get my prescription...it runs out a week after my appointment. Hopefully that appointment doesn't get cancelled...who knows what she'll want for my next renewal. Thanks for the stress doc...don't you know that too much stress can cause medical problems? Anyone else have doctor stories like this that they want to share?

My Wife Encouraged Me to Pay $300 for a Date with a 26 Year Old Girl

HA! That got your attention, didn't it? So, last night Katharine and I attended the 7th Annual Mardi Gras Date Auction to support the American Liver Foundation's Run for Research Marathon Team. If you don't know what happens at this particular function, a variety of 8 guys and 8 girls were "auctioned" off for a date that is specified ahead of time in the person's bio on the event website. Since one of Katharine's friends was participating in the auction, we went to cheer her on.

Here's where that whole $300 thing comes in. We had no idea what the "normal" bid was for a date with a person...the first person went for a steal...like $200. So we wanted to make sure that her friend got at least that. The plan was for me to bid up to $300 and then hope that someone else bid higher because obviously I wouldn't actually GO on the date (even though Katharine said "whatever, go ahead")...but I would still have to buck up the $300 (which we were splitting with other friends by the way). It turns out that she didn't need our money...she went for something like $600 (and then again later for a second date, another $450), so her ego was intact and we saved a bunch of money. I think the highest bid of the night was $700 for a night with someone I wouldn't have bid on at all, but I guess everyone has different taste. On the way home, we talked a lot about who we would have bid on had we been single; and we pretty much agreed on which ones were worth bidding on. Maybe next year. ;-)

T-Shirts That My Parents Gave Me

Several weeks ago, I posted a snapshot of a shirt that Katharine brought me back from Vegas that read, "Stolen from Mabel's Whorehouse...", but that wasn't the first shirt I ever owned that couldn't...or should I say "shouldn't" have been worn out in public. Oh yes mom and dad...I'm talking to you.

I remember when I was about 8 years old...I was wearing a shirt that my dad made me with a particular leaf plastered on the front. That innocent 8 year old was walking into a convenience store; the type of store where teenagers hang out and one of them asked me if I had any pot. One would wonder why another would ask an 8 year old this question, but in this case, the 8 year old had a t-shirt with a marijuana leaf design. Apparently, my parents weren't born in the 70s.

The second inappropriate t-shirt experience was when I was 12 and I went to Hawaii with my family. This one, I have photographic proof of because I was wearing it in most of the pictures from Hawaii. I can only find one of the 192 pictures I took, but here it is. Look closely at the t-shirt and try to ignore the gawky looking, not quite a teenager, in the picture...and the fact that I apparently didn't know how to properly tuck a shirt in.

In case you can't read it, it says, "Sex is a misdemeanor. The more I miss demeanor I get". Did I mention that I'm 12. To be fair, since my mom will read this...I turned out OK.