THEATER: Sweeney Todd (2007) - Beware the Demon Barber

Did I mention that I'm not a huge fan of musicals? OK, it's not that I'm not a huge fan, I just don't like them...I think it's all the singing. Yeah, that's it...the part I hate the most about musicals is the singing. So last night, because I'm the greatest husband on the planet, I took Katharine to see the Off-Broadway production of Sweeney Todd. I know what you're thinking...if I was the greatest husband, I would have taken her to the On-Broadway production, but this was much cheaper as we didn't have to stay in a hotel and we had cereal for dinner.

Anyway...that's not what's important here. The show. The production itself was fantastic. The actors and actresses doubled as the orchestra when they weren't performing their speaking parts. They passed instruments around like they could play any which one of them. Their emotions matched the scene...even if they weren't the focus. I was impressed...even for a musical hater.

The story...well...that was a little slower than I would have liked. I don't believe it takes two and half hours to tell the story of a demon barber who wants revenge when his family is taken from him while he is away in prison. I could tell that story in an hour, but when you sing all of your dialogue...it takes longer. It doesn't take a whole song to tell the world that you're sad...or angry...but it does in a musical.

Let's talk about the most important issue though...the seats. The seats at the Colonial Theater in Boston have so little leg room...I'm not a tall person and I could BARELY fit. The guy next to me was 6' tall and he had to pull his legs in. We didn't have crappy seats, but at the same time...we did.

Would I go again to see a musical. Maybe. I think I'm planning to attend the March showing of Avenue Q, which is about inapropriate muppets...basically. And that suits me better than a demon barber.

Welcome to Random Reviews of Random Things

Look at this...finally...a new feature in this space! I took away movie reviews a couple of months ago and all of a sudden a bunch of people informed me that they were reading the movie reviews. In its place I've had placed an advertisement for the 5th Alfred, Unibrow, and the Big Headed Boy movie, which I haven't started working on yet...so I thought to myself...why not put back the reviews if people like them? And then Katharine suggested reviews of everything...not necessarily just movies.

And so I was immediately interested in this new idea because there are some new games coming out next week that I want to play: Manhunt 2, Smackdown Vs. Raw 2008, and Mass Effect. There are some movies coming out that I'd like to review such as 30 Days of Night. PLUS...I'll be attending a performance of Sweeney Todd this week...a musical, which I'm typically not fond of, but we'll see how it goes. PLUS PLUS, I've got tickets to see Van Halen's reunion show without Michael Anthony, but with David Lee Roth who has been absent from the band for 22 years. I saw them 20 years ago this month, so that will be fun to write about. And so much more to review...TV Shows, Restaurants, DVDs...this is going to be good.

Jeff with a Beard for Halloween

It starts out as laziness...for about 4 or 5 days I don't shave, it's fairly typical for me much to the dismay of some family members. If I go much longer than that, I start to get annoyed and this time would be no different. I got up a few minutes earlier picked up my Mach III Turbo battery powered razor...my can of shaving cream...and that's when it happened. My can of shaving cream exploded. It wasn't a fiery explosion, but the cap popped off and shaving cream spewed from the nozzle. I suppose I could have used that shaving cream, but like I said...I only had a few extra minutes, and it took that long to clean up the mess. So there I was...5, 6, 7, 8 days worth of growth. By the time I went to the store to pick up shaving cream, it was about 10 days of growth and almost Halloween, so I thought to myself...I've never had a beard...let's see what it looks like...I can be "Jeff with a Beard" for Halloween. That's my costume.

So now it's about 3-4 weeks of growth later and I don't particularly care for it, but I've only got another week to go...it's the cheapest costume EVER and it saves me time in the morning. Can't beat that for convenience.

There's a Rumor Going Around That I Have a Short Attention Span When it Comes to Cars

There's this rumor going around that I like to drive a different car every two years (or less). Let's travel back in time a little bit. First I had the lovable but troublesome Mini Cooper. Had it repaired 7 times in the exactly one year I owned it. Then I moved on to the ugly, boxy, but extremely versatile and useful Honda Element. Then I traded back to an automatic transmission because I got sick of constantly shifting in traffic...so I now have a Jeep Liberty. All this happened in the last 5 years, so maybe the rumor isn't such a rumor.

So anyway...that's all in the past. Now I need a new car and I have some requirements. I want OnStar. Doesn't matter why I want it...I just do. I need at least All Wheel Drive...aka AWD. Trust me...this isn't a want as much as it is a need with the hill that I live at the top of...and considering it snows here for a quarter of the year. I've narrowed it down to the Saturn VUE, the Chevy Equinox, or some Saab car...I forget the model designation...Seven of Nine...or something like that.

I looked at Hybrid cars...I tried...I really did...but THEY don't want us to buy Hybrid cars or they wouldn't be twice as expensive as a non-Hybrid car. You know who THEY are...you don't have to ask me. So what do you think? Which car do you think I should get that has OnStar and has AWD? I'm open to suggestions.

Does Anyone Else Have Animals That Think They're Never Going to Be Fed Again

We feed the dog and the cat at the same time of day...every single day including weekends. Yet right this minute, Monty our beloved greyhound, is staring me in the face, looking as worried as ever, and he wants me to feed him early...like I never do. The cat...Lily...is meowing like she hasn't had a meal in weeks. Our animals are well fed...don't go calling the MSPCA on us...they're just greedy. The animals...not the MSPCA. They (still the animals) continue to panic every night around dinner time that they won't get fed...and they worry about this right up until the moment they ARE fed. And then, after their stomachs are full, they get quiet and ignore us because apparently that's all we're good for...until snack time for kitty later in the evening...around 10pm. Like she knows it's time or something.

Do they wear watches? They seem to know what time to start fussing whether it's morning, dinner time, or snack time. I think they can tell time. Seriously. They're slowing driving us insane, and maybe that's their plan. But then, who would feed them. Would you?

Bioshock: Hey Little Sister, What Have You Done

I just finished playing Bioshock, the best game ever made, so far, for the XBOX 360. I'll try not to ruin the story, but I have to talk about elements of it...at least as I played it.

Whenever Katharine and I both play a game, we play differently. She plays the goody goody role and I play that bastard. Some of you are thinking...just like real life. So in this particular game, you play this guy who crashes into the ocean and finds himself in Rapture...an underwater city with a bunch of "spliced up" people that used to be human (I think)...there are some giant robotic creatures with drills on their arms called Big Daddys and little girls under some kind of mind control who bleed you dry when you're already dead, and they are Little Sisters. Sounds like a family game, right?

So, I couldn't play this game until I healed up a bit from surgery because games like this tend to tense up my muscles...and that's not good when healing. Katharine finished it twice and then it was my turn. She played goody goody both times. I started off slow and cautiously with a wrench in hand. Moved deeper and deeper into Rapture and learned the story through in game recordings. The surroundings got creepier, the sounds created a stressful atmosphere. I learned that I could save the Little Sisters if I wanted to...OR I could become all that more powerful by destroying them. The game had to end differently if I destroyed them right? They were evil anyway, weren't they? Internal dilemna.

As difficult as it was, I destroyed them all...every single one of them so I could get the achievement...because I'm an XBOX 360 achievement whore. And the end of the game...let's just say that it didn't have the fuzzy and happy ending that Katharine saw. Well, I didn't expect that. I guess they gave me 3 chances to redeem myself and I ignored them...achievement whore. Had to "deal with" every last one of them. What would you have done if came across this in a dark alley?